As you know I usually share my personal stories with you from my ‘artist’s perspective’. The past month has been so challenging that I haven’t had the energy or the resolve to write. I can’t be superficial, yet I felt too vulnerable to be honest.
In the space of two weeks, my phone and my car stopped working, a person with power to do so, threatened my ability to make enough money to provide for my family and in a separate situation, my children’s welfare and safety has been put in jeopardy.
I had a choice – stand firm or flee.
Like you, I want to thrive, not just survive. I am tired of struggle.
My inclination was to crawl into a dark hole, curl up and hide.
So, I asked myself why. What did lying in that comforting hole mean and how would it help?
The answer I came up with is that it’s instinctual behaviour to retreat and lie low. I needed a safe place to ‘ground’ myself, to reconnect with my core, draw strength and get back on my feet.
So now I’m standing… if a little wobbly… I’m painting, I’m intentionally loving my kids and actively seeking other ways to earn an income. I won’t give up aiming to thrive, but now you understand why sometimes I may go quiet.